Does love eventually finally die? Or can it be saved?

One of the oldest and most widespread myths about long-term relationships is that

love and passion last only at the beginning. 

Heartbeats and butterflies, along with fun are doomed to fade or even "die". "Seven years of itching", "Marriage kills love", "Now we have become parents, let's not want it all"… How many times have you heard or said these phrases? But I will tell you that you have the right to want everything, not in a selfish way, like a spoiled child. You have to try, decide how strong this desire of yours is and take responsibility. The control center must be gradually transferred from external factors such as luck, time spent, others, to yourself.

There are many reasons you can think of for the flame that goes out. Lack of common time, crazy schedules, children and their demands, habit after all. Distance brings a lack of intimacy, this lack destroys the erotic attraction, thus reducing the mood for communication and a vicious circle is born that brings frustration, negativity and widens the distance. You can break this cycle.

1. You have to create what you want. Do not sit and wait for it. Be emotionally available and take action. Think about what you did at the beginning of your relationship? You were ready to do anything to make him / her happy. What are you doing now?

2. Research from the field of positive psychology tells us that it takes 4 positive experiences in our relationship to overcome a negative one. How can this happen; By communication. Try to really listen to the other person, what he says and not what you think he is saying; there is a big difference and he wants skills that you need to cultivate. Talking about the day's events is not enough communication. Listen carefully to your partner's wishes, ideas and goals. Try to understand what is being said beyond words.

3. Leave the old stories where they belong, in the past. Do not bring them back and do not filter your man through them. You live now, let your thoughts be in the now. Instead, think of these as actions that you must take on a regular basis, and that 's it. Now.

4. Accept the change. Everything and everyone changes, this is how things are and our resistance to change probably creates problems. You no longer see the features you fell in love with and you are disappointed. Look for others, you will surely find them. Get out of the habit and do something different, something new.

5. Offer yourself first. Prioritize your partner and he will reciprocate. When you are closed to yourself and just waiting for the other person to make a move that does not come you feel rejected and frustrated. Break this circle and start over. You may be surprised by the response.